Being poor can feel like you’re stuck, and when everyone you know disappears into the world when they have the chance, you realize how truly stuck you are. When you’re young, it’s simple stuff like not being able to go to day camp, anywhere on spring break, or to anything but the free stuff you […]
Class cultures
Brexit: Race and Class
I had very mixed emotions about the Brexit vote. Having watched the manner in which the European Union strangled Greece, I have not been very sanguine about the EU as a project. The guiding vision of the EU is neo-liberal globalization. And it is determined to impose this on the continent. At the same time, […]
Brexit – A Class Issue
Two weeks on, a lot of progressive people in Britain are still in deep shock or fury or despair – or alternating rapidly between all three emotional states. A full 51.9% of British people voted to Leave the European Union (Brexit), and 48.1% voted to Remain in the EU. It was 17.4 million votes to 16.1 million. […]
African Americans and Classism:
It’s Complicated When I started this post, I thought it would be a straight-forward musing on classism on and in African-American communities. A few minutes in, and I found that I didn’t know where to start. Should I write about the devastating effect that the intersectionality of classism and racism has on individuals and communities? Should I […]
Walk a Mile
They are phrases we’ve all heard a million times and show up in comments on social media: “If you’re on food stamps you don’t belong buyin’ a candy bar.” “I shouldn’t have to pay for your shrimp and steak dinner.” “The nanny state offers no incentive to work.” “Poor people are just lazy.” “It’s not […]
Can’t Buy Me Love
Being Poor in a Cross-Class Relationship We had just turned 18. We had just started dating after two years of friendship. We had just walked into one of my worst nightmares: Which friggin’ fork do I use first?!? My boyfriend was wealthy, and I was poor. It normally didn’t affect our relationship very much, because […]
Class Mobility – Climbing Up, Stepping Down
I grew up in the suburbs of Baltimore, the granddaughter of Hungarian Jews who survived the Holocaust and came to this country with nothing. My father grew up and worked in the same bakery where his Dad worked. His Mom was a seamstress. My Mom’s side was also working-class but slightly better off. Her dad, […]
It’s Not What You Say, but How?
Using Language as a Weapon of Classism A British friend of mine, who met and married his American wife in London, told me that he dreaded attending her job-related social functions in “The Square Mile.” As a bank executive, her coworkers were mostly upper middle-class, and they, along with banking and corporate elites, attended these […]
Language Matters, Too
My brother, sister and I were all brought up to speak a very clear, accent-less English with good grammar and syntax. We were not “perfect,” but we were obliged to try. Our mother harassed us constantly about the way we talked. And she stressed that we would never be able to get a job or […]
To Advisors of First Gen Students: Tell the Truth
I can still vividly remember my first days on campus as a first generation, first gen, college student. How lush and expansive if felt in comparison to the slums of Cleveland. This was a whole new world literally, and I was new in it. I had made it from poverty to the rolling lawns and […]
Seeing the World: The View from Above
Ever since I was a little girl, my parents have taken me traveling all over the world. They have always told me how lucky I was to have been exposed to these different cultures, how open minded it made me, and how it made me unlike “those other kids” who had never traveled outside their […]
Visiting the Relatives: A Worthy Vacation
My nephew Christopher loaded his three kids and his partner Sam’s three kids into their 2004 passenger van and drove the 300 miles out of the city to visit me last week. He took Thursday afternoon and all day Friday without pay, which gave the family three-and-a-half days in total. This was their summer vacation. […]
When Love Crosses Class Lines
What’s it like to be married to someone who grew up in a different class? If you asked most of the 64 college-educated adults who I interviewed who did so, they would tell you that it was like being married to anyone else. Most said that they loved their partner deeply, and, like all couples, […]
Is That What They Would Say?: Home Knowledge vs. School Knowledge
Two incidents from my school years illustrate the clash between home experience and school assumptions. In second grade, I was drawing in my Alice and Jerry book, a lovely book about the foreign country of the middle class where kids got surprise playhouses for their birthdays— built, painted, and transported by Dad and Grandpa who’d […]
Cultivating the Joy of Gift Giving
When I was a little girl, we never had extravagant Christmases. As excited as we were about the gifts, my mom always reinforced that “Jesus is the reason for the season” by making a Betty Crocker birthday cake for Jesus every year, we didn’t bother to put the right number of candles on, obviously. My […]
Demolition Derby
I remember my first demolition derby, years ago as a young parent. It was the thrill of illicit activity that drew me there. My parents—middle class academic types with progressive values—would never have dreamed of lending their support to such an uncouth spectacle; their disapproval would have been unconditional. A theme of my adult life […]
A surprising class culture pattern
When I was studying 25 social justice groups for Missing Class, one of my biggest surprises was a class category I hadn’t even thought to look for: lower professionals. Activists of that class had such unique ways of speaking, participating, and especially dealing with conflict that they had a notable impact on their groups. By […]
Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?
Working with couples who hail from different class backgrounds is one of my specialties as a counseling psychologist. I offer an example from my counseling practice to illustrate how different class backgrounds, and their cultural assumptions, can confound a marriage. One couple met in college, where she got a para-legal certificate and he got a […]
When Love Crosses Class Lines
What’s it like to be married to someone who grew up in a different class? If you asked most of the 64 college-educated adults who I interviewed who did so, they would tell you that it was like being married to anyone else. Most said that they loved their partner deeply, and, like all couples, […]
The Price of Passing
Recently, a community college newspaper offered a fashion profile of several students. I was amazed and alarmed to learn that, if they were telling the truth, they were spending $200-plus on a pair of shoes and the same for a handbag. It’s true that the recent economic downturn has sent middle and upper middle class […]